Many years ago when I was an active alcoholic, during a blackout and with “friends” I hardly knew - found myself six hours from my home at a “party” at a remote cabin on the coast of Canada.
When I “came to” to discover my whereabouts- in shock- I complained and was assaulted by the owner of the house. It was night time (around 12
midnight), autumn, pouring rain and cold out —and I was only wearing a light cotton jacket- but due to my horror at what this person did to me I walked out the door and found myself in the bitter cold Canadian wilderness. I bushwhacked through the woods for hours and wept thinking this was my last night on earth. I bumped into trees and fell over stones in the dark until I was crawling on my hands and knees . Finally I prayed to God “please help me” and when I opened my eyes I saw a tiny spark in the distance…
I could barely make out what it was— but it was all I had , so I followed it like it was the Star of David. After a spell I found my way to a small cabin with a bulb hanging from the roof of a tiny porch. I crawled up the steps and knocked and an old woman wrapped in a shawl answered and welcomed me into her home. The rest is history. I hold this story in my heart and memory as a reminder of the Light Within and the prayer that saved me .
That Light is God ….i knocked and He heard me.
(FYI I have been sober now for twenty three years -and I owe my sobriety and health to that Light of God)
Great article. After my partner died, some of my friends tried very hard to fix me, and get back to the happy person they once knew. Yet I think I was in fact walking towards the darkness - where I could grow spiritually and where God’s transformation could occur.
Yes, it sounds like you were following your soul's wisdom. I've been a 'fix it project' for others in times of deep sorrow before as well - I couldn't say why consciously, but my heart was having none of it....
Ah the darkness ... my old friend. I'm not talking here about the acute pain of fear, or physical agony, but the calm that can sometimes visit us when we realise the inevitability of its presence. That without it, the light could not be. We live in a world of duality where the existence of one thing necessitates the existence of its opposite. So - in calmer mode - we can understand and accept this and wait for the darkness to pass, as it inevitably must.
Thank you, Mark! This is perfect timing for me right now, and for many of us. It is one of my favorite Advent passages, too, and I love your reframing it as a question and where the logic leads from there. Beautiful reflection, thank you!
I love this.
Thank you.
Many years ago when I was an active alcoholic, during a blackout and with “friends” I hardly knew - found myself six hours from my home at a “party” at a remote cabin on the coast of Canada.
When I “came to” to discover my whereabouts- in shock- I complained and was assaulted by the owner of the house. It was night time (around 12
midnight), autumn, pouring rain and cold out —and I was only wearing a light cotton jacket- but due to my horror at what this person did to me I walked out the door and found myself in the bitter cold Canadian wilderness. I bushwhacked through the woods for hours and wept thinking this was my last night on earth. I bumped into trees and fell over stones in the dark until I was crawling on my hands and knees . Finally I prayed to God “please help me” and when I opened my eyes I saw a tiny spark in the distance…
I could barely make out what it was— but it was all I had , so I followed it like it was the Star of David. After a spell I found my way to a small cabin with a bulb hanging from the roof of a tiny porch. I crawled up the steps and knocked and an old woman wrapped in a shawl answered and welcomed me into her home. The rest is history. I hold this story in my heart and memory as a reminder of the Light Within and the prayer that saved me .
That Light is God ….i knocked and He heard me.
(FYI I have been sober now for twenty three years -and I owe my sobriety and health to that Light of God)
Thanks be to God! Thank you Joanna for this beautiful story of walking in darkness, and of God's saving grace. I'm honored by your sharing.
Thank YOU❤️
Great article. After my partner died, some of my friends tried very hard to fix me, and get back to the happy person they once knew. Yet I think I was in fact walking towards the darkness - where I could grow spiritually and where God’s transformation could occur.
Yes, it sounds like you were following your soul's wisdom. I've been a 'fix it project' for others in times of deep sorrow before as well - I couldn't say why consciously, but my heart was having none of it....
Ah the darkness ... my old friend. I'm not talking here about the acute pain of fear, or physical agony, but the calm that can sometimes visit us when we realise the inevitability of its presence. That without it, the light could not be. We live in a world of duality where the existence of one thing necessitates the existence of its opposite. So - in calmer mode - we can understand and accept this and wait for the darkness to pass, as it inevitably must.
Thank you, Mark! This is perfect timing for me right now, and for many of us. It is one of my favorite Advent passages, too, and I love your reframing it as a question and where the logic leads from there. Beautiful reflection, thank you!
You're welcome Tom! Glad it resonates in this season.